Cock Blockin Friends

Cock Blockers

Scenario: you [ladies] get all dressed up, smellin fresh, lookin hotter than kunta kente in the field under a hot summer sun, and go out to the club.  You get a lil drinky poo and sashay on over to the edge of the dance floor.  The D.J. puts on the only hit JKwon ever had, and it just happens to be your song.  You and your girls go out to the floor.  Up walks a man and asks you to dance.

————————–  BLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM ——————————–

All 7 of your girlfriends get in between you and him and tell him where to go, when to go, how far he can go, and WTF is he thinking tryin to holla when JKwon is on.

Ok, you haven’t been cock blocked, but he has.  So what’s the deal?  Why did all of you and your girls get dressed up and actually took a shower and washed your stank nasty?  Was it to sit around and have a hen party?  Yall coulda done that at home in your big mamma draws.  Yall coulda sat around in rollers, housecoats and house-shoes and ate chocolate ice-cream.

The Real Reason Behind Cock Blockin

I have some REAL girl friends. [girls that will tell it to me raw and uncut]  They scare me at times.  They don’t act like dudes, but they do not act prissy when they are telling me the scoop.  So here is what they told me is going on.

  1. your homegirls are straight up carpet munchers and you just don’t know it.  [DO NOT shoot the messenger]  They say that the girls are cock blockin, not to protect you, but to keep the competition down, so they can slowly convert you to their side.  You don’t know what’s going on, because they won’t just come out and say it.  They are on the sly.  They are women, so the “down low” game is crafted, practiced and perfected.  One of these nights they’ll spring it on you and entice you with it.  Watch out.
  2. they can’t get a man themselves and don’t want to be left alone.  So they play defense to men hitting on you.  They then come back to you and try and turn it around as if the guy was no good. [I have had this happen to me.  And, the girl told me, straight up, that her friends said I was no good.  I’m like WTF, I put the oooooo in good.]  So it has nothing to do with the guy, and EVERYTHING to do with your damn homely girlfriends.
  3. girls are catty. [do not shoot the messenger, I’m just passin on what i heard.] Your girlfriends, AIN’T your friends at all.  Oh, they laugh and call you, and ask you to go shoppin, but they turn around and talk about you like a dog when you ain’t around.  And, the cock blockin stuff?  That’s to keep you nice and miserable.  You don’t deserve a man.  You’re trash. [that’s what they’re thinking]  So they cock block you.  AND WORSE, they turn around and hook up with someone.  WORSE STILL, one of them hooks up with that guy.  The one they said was no good.
  4. [and I’ve experience this one firsthand.] They think you are too stupid to handle a man by yourself.

So those are the top 4 things my girlfriends have told me. [no not my boom boom, pow, girlfriends, just girls that are friends]  Now, I ask you.  Do you actually need a defensive line?  Do you need friends that are running a post up for you? [I know nothing about football, so I don’t even know if I just said something smart.]

Or, are you woman enough to decline invitations, based on your own attraction or non-attraction for a man.  Because, let me tell you what’s going on.  There are people who are trying their best to steer you into a relationship that you really don’t need.

Let me touch on #4 again briefly with my own experience.

So my best friend in college, got a girlfriend.  One night he says he would like for me to meet a girl.  So all 4 of us piled in his car and went to his apartment off-campus.  They put the girl and I in his bedroom and he and his girl stayed in the living room.  For whatever reason they turned off all the lights in the house except the hall.  Ok!  So, I being a gentleman, was talking to the girl to get to know her.  Well I never had an opportunity.  Every 10 minutes the girlfriend would walk into the room and check up on us.  YES SHE WOULD COME IN AND CHECKUP ON US. And, when she left, she would leave the door ajar.  After everything was over, I asked what was the purpose of the night.  She said she was protecting her friend. [the friend moved far faster than it did. she had me on the floor stroking me chest in 5 minutes. but hey what was i to do]  Come to find out, while she was cock blockin me, one of the times she didn’t come in, she and my friend had full on sex in the living room.  I never saw the girl again, nor did I ever go on a blind date with my friend and his catty girl friend from hell. [she was the worst person I’ve ever layed eyes on.]

How many women wake up 30 yrs old and start freaking out that they don’t have a man.

Let’s take a walk with the ghost of christmas past eh?  Let’s go back and see.  Yup, she rejected 34,000 men, who potentially wanted to date her.  You see ladies, the powers that be, have turned men into such pussies that they accept rejection right away.  Even when you didn’t even know you were rejecting them.

For instance:

a man walks up and asks you which way is F street.  You’re new to the area, so you really don’t know.  He’s trying to strike up a conversation with you.  You don’t catch on, because you’re clueless.  So, you say you don’t know where F street is and keep stepping. He just struck out and keeps moving too.

You don’t realize you just rejected him.
“Well if he were man enough, he coulda just come out and flirt with me.”  Oh I hear that all the time.  Really?  He can just come out and flirt with you?  You know how women feel pressure from magazines to be thin?  You’ve seen that story on t.v. and the news.  Well men are now being pressured to NOT hit on women.  Men are being subtly told that it is not OK to let a woman know you are attracted to them.

Pickup line: it’s a modern thing to invent a pickup line.  Think for a second.  It wasn’t too long ago that men and women were just put together and expected to be together.  All of a sudden, all sorts of roles reversed and men had to come up with pickup lines to get women. Thirty years ago, your friend would say “I know a guy that’s perfect for you.”  And, away you and Billy would go, and the rest is history.  Guys would do the same, “I know a girl you’d like.”  There was no game playing.  There was no dress up.  It was, “here I am, do you like me or not.”

Anyone that lives in a world where they believe men don’t like women and women don’t like men, needs to turn in their human race card and exit the planet.  That’s like those companies that send the guy to “sensitivity training” for daring to hit on the receptionist.  Let me clue you in right now.  The company doesn’t car about the man and it definitely doesn’t care about the receptionist.  They wish they could hire robots to make them money.

So if you’re out and your friends try to cock block, remind them you’re a woman, and at some point in life, you’re gonna need dick a man.  If they don’t like it, get new friends.

Oh, if you’re one of these women that say “men are nothing but dogs, I don’t need no man.”  The depth of the help you need mentally, is beyond the scope of this article.

PEACE

Please visit my legal website: DUI
See me on YouTube: Shakaama Live
Need a Notary in Las Vegas Nevada Notary Public Nevada

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shakaama

Ex law school student. I was kicked out for revealing I had a heart actually beating inside. I used to be in a modern dance company. I'm working on my 7 miracles to be proclaimed a saint by the pope. #1 is really hard, but once i get over that hump the other 6 will be a cinch.

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