Black Women the Most Alone
|I Look Just Like This Guy|
So many Black women are alone. The Black American woman is the single most, unpartnered person on the planet. [this is not unwed mothers, this is single women] Is there a rift between black women and black men? At first blush you would think that there would be no reason why a black man would not want to date a black woman. But, as in business, since we are in modern times and for the most part black people are not considered 2nd class citizens any more, the dating pool for black men is wide open. Black women now have to compete with all races to date black men. It might seem strange to the average reader that I would couch those words in that way, i.e. women competing for a man. However, that is exactly how the sexes work. It is not the man that primps and preens himself, it is the woman. The woman primps and preens herself to attract the best possible man, not the other way around. If I were concerned about people’s feelings, I’d try to beat around the bush, but seriously, there’s a multi-billion dollar beauty industry. Do you really want me to kid around with you?
[UPDATE: I am taking applications for dating, Dark Black educated women to the front of the line, the rest, I’ll get to you, if I don’t find my love at first site first. ] [yes I got jokes]
No human on the planet has been more sexually objectified than the black man. He has been regarded as the essence of sex by most races. When tiny Europeans encountered the large Africans, they were at a loss when they saw their private parts. Many diaries and documentation either praised or demonized the black man’s privates. However, be they god or demon, they instantly became an object of desire. Fast forward some 1,000 years to the present and we now have the freedom for all the races to partake of the black man, at their leisure. It is this open season for Black men, that Black women have to compete with.
Instead of realizing what is going on, the black woman erroneously thinks she has cornered the market on black men and can thus act any way she wants.
|photo by mayaguezphoto.com|
In fairness modern society has not helped out the relationship situation at all. With modern financial times as they are, the black woman, as well as other races, has had to put on her pants suit, and throw away the dress, just to make ends meet.
Also there is a complete lack of understanding on the black woman’s part, as to the struggle of the black man. Now you would think, of all the people on the planet that should understand a black man, it would be a black woman. Not so! In fact there is a complete anti-compasionnate mindset that black women develop, when it comes to black men. In essence they shoot themselves in the foot, for no apparent reason.
More often than not, other females, from other races understand the plight of the black man, and are compassionate towards him, more so than the Black women. Understand that other races are accustomed to nurturing, mentoring and guiding their own men as well. With that sort of mindset, Black women have absolutely no grounds to even claim a Black man. In essence, in this situation, black women have nothing to offer black men. And, black men won’t tolerate it. There has been a complete paradigm shift with the relation attitude of black women, towards black men, and visa versa. But, it has been to the detriment of the black woman.
Top 10 Reasons Black Men Won’t Date or Marry a Black Woman
- 1. black women make black men feel under-appreciated, unwarranted, irresponsible, and regressive. Black women tend to emasculate Black men. – Black women answer this by saying they have to be strong and can’t help emasculating her Black man.
- Black women are too aggressive and no longer patient in the waiting on the pursuit of Black men.
- Black women are strong headed, too independent, present great challenges in relationships.
- Black women are masculine, in that they are controlling, and like to run the relationship,
- Black women expect too much, they are gold diggers who will not look twice at a blue collar worker,
- Black women are hot headed and have bad attitudes,
- Black women stop caring about their appearance after a certain age, [around 40]
- Black women are not sexually open as other races, especially in regards to oral sex
- Black women’s tolerance is far too low, they are no longer empathetic to the black man’s struggle in white America
- Black women do not cater to their man
To understand this list, you have understand something first. That is, the historical relationship white men have had with Black women. I’m sure noone wants me to talk about that. To hide this relationship and lust for Black women, white men have come up with some very crude caricatures of Black women, so as to appease or cloud the judgment of white women.
If you now compare the list with the stereotypes, you can clearly see, that black women have themselves fallen victim to the caricatures hoisted on them and have thus shunned, driven off or scared off black men.
Historical Stereotypes of the Black Woman
A) Mammy – this is the middle aged, fat, skinning and grinning, loves to take care of the white kids, asexual, nannyish, disregarded black woman. This image was developed and cultivated to cloud the judgment of white women into thinking that black women were wholey unattractive. Remember this image was cultivated during slavery. For the most part Black slaves didn’t live that long. Secondly, they worked all day and every one of them had shapely muscular bodies, men and women. I’m sure many of you remember the scene in roots where the slave owner goes down to the slave quarters and has his way with the vivacious slave girl. This mammy image was cultivated so that when a white woman thought of a female slave, the image came to mind, making her feel safe, since no one would want to be with a mammy.
A lot of mature black women see themselves in this light and dress accordingly. They lose all sense of self, and think that since they are over 30, they no longer need to primp and preen to attract a man. And, it works, no man is attracted to them, and it feeds into their self-deprecation.
No one wants to date a mammy. She is of no sexual attractiveness whatsoever. And this stereotype doesn’t have be measured in terms of age. Picture this, a Black “girl”, 20 something year old, with long fake hair, long fake nails and dresses sloppy and doesn’t take care of her figure. This is the mammy figure, only in a modern, younger version of it. However, you can’t tell the black girl she is unattractive to Black men, because she won’t accept, nor believe it.
B)Jezebel – this is the hypersexual Black woman image that lusts after white men. They are portrayed as a man stealer. They are also portrayed as slutty, unwomanly, unlady-like and complete tramps, nothing a real man would want to date, nor marry. Perhaps this image was developed for white women to fear black women, not as a direct threat, someone beneath the white woman, someone she can scorn with abandon. The Jezebel stereotype depicted black women as seductive temptresses with an animal-like appetite for sex. The Jezebel trope depicts black women as seductive temptresses with an
insatiable and animalistic appetite for sex. Beguiling, voluptuous, lewd and lustful; the
Jezebel’s greatest wish is to be ****ed to death. During slavery the Jezebel image served
several functions for oppressors. However, it was primarily used to justify the sexual
exploitation of Black women. Because the Jezebel maintains a ravenous desire for sex;
forced sex between master and slave was not viewed with disdain (by the oppressive
class). The notion that Jezebels were immoral and desired sex, in general, and with white
men specifically, served to justify the rape and subjugation of Black women.
No one wants to marry a Jezebel. I’m sure there are men who wouldn’t mind spending a night with a Jezebel, or two, but no man wants to marry, bring him to mom, have children by [that he cares about] a Jezebel. If you are dressing like a whore, you are going to attract a whore or someone not decent. No decent Black man would want to be seen with a Jezebel, because that would reflect on him, as having poor taste. And, a Jezebel would never be seen as having a brain nor a decent conversation. After the sex, the other 23 hours in the day has to be spent talking to your mate. If you aren’t seen as being good enough to talk to, noone is going to hang around for those 23 hours. The jezebel image has taken off in recent years. Many Black oriented magazines have completely revamped and repackaged the jezebel look. Many Jezebels grace the covers of Black men’s magazines. It is disgraceful. The more these images are seen the less and less Black men will even want to date or even less, talk to a Black woman who dresses like that. Don’t mistake “let’s have sex” with talking to you.
C) Sapphire – this image is the angry Black woman. It was developed by the white man, to portray the black woman as some irrational animal, monster, sub-human. The Sapphire (or angry sister) is another very popular stereotype promulgated by today’s mass media. Sapphire originated “as a live television image in the person of the Amos and Andy character Sapphire Stevens” The Sapphire has no specific physical features. Typically, her complexion is brown or dark brown. She is a mature adult whose build is moderate to stout. The Sapphire is loud, overbearing, shrewd and aggressive. She is ambitious, educated and seems to relish conflict; especially with (in her opinion) the “good for nothing” Black man.
“The most notable characteristic of Sapphire is her sassiness which is exceeded only by her verbosity. She is also noted for telling people off and spouting her opinion in an animated loud manner. Because of her intense expressiveness and hands-on-hip, finger-pointing style, Sapphire is viewed as comedic and is never taken seriously”
Ultimately, she represents the domineering emasculator. The Sapphire image of Black womanhood, unlike other images that symbolize Black women, necessitates the presence of a (black) man. When the Sapphire is depicted it is the man who represents the point of contention. Her sheer existence is predicated on the trickery and lack of integrity of her male counterparts. This allows her to project her superior moral compass onto the amoral (black) man.
Noone wants to date a sapphire. No Black man needs to go to work, be eyed all day as a robber, thug, murderer, rapist, thief, mongoloid, animal and then come home to a Black woman that emasculates him. It’s just not going to happen. You drive away a black man by the millions. And while you might be angry, you have just ruined it with 1,000 other sisters who think life is great and having a Black man would be great.
The tragedy here is, every sapphire has their own unique thought about what a “man” is. And, while they might think they are all saying the same thing “my man is no good”, they mean totally different things. Their definition of a man does not agree, not in any objective type of way. While one might be angry that her and her man never goes anywhere, another might be angry that he does not bring her flowers or candy. And, when they compare notes, each could care less about what the other sapphire is angry about, because to them that’s not important. However, in the mean time, their loud boisterous nature has driven both men off into the arms of a white / asian / latin girl that could care less about all of those things.
|The Tragic Mulatto|
D) tragic mulatto – this is the image of the biracial Black woman that doesn’t fit in either race. She is not welcomed by the white race. She is not welcomed by the Black race. She then commits suicide in despair. The tragic mulatto emphasized her personal pathologies: self-hatred, depression, alcoholism, sexual perversion, and suicide attempts being the most common. If light enough to “pass” as White, she did, but passing led to deeper self-loathing. She pitied or despised Blacks and the “blackness” in herself; she hated or feared Whites yet desperately sought their approval. In a race-based society, the tragic mulatto found peace only in death. She evoked pity or scorn, not sympathy.
Black men can’t date a tragic mulatto. Simply because she won’t have him. I’ve personally met a couple of black women who said they would never, ever date a Black man. [ secretly between you and me, they weren’t all that pretty, nor all that bright, so it’s no loss to the gene pool anyway ] But, the tragic mulatto today is so convinced of her superiority over Black men, She could never see herself with a Black man. She joins the white side in castigating the Black man. While she may not be loud and boisterous like the sapphire, she may be caught saying the same things under her breath. The tragedy of course is she runs to the arms of some white man, who then wakes up and realizes he’s with a filthy Black woman, and dumps her. Although stereotypical, it’s all too true.
Do not get me wrong, Black men make these mistakes too, but nowhere near the numbers that Black women do. Remember my earlier quote that the Black American female is the most single and unmarried person on the planet]
Although these stereotypes were hand-crafted and cultivated by white men to objectify and dehumanize Black women, so many Black women actully fall into these stereotypes by themselves.